Confidence

Once we are comfortable in solitude, we can work on our confidence. Oxford Languages dictionary defines confidence as a feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s own abilities or qualities. Confidence is important in a relationship because it helps us talk to the person we like without seeking their approval or hinging our self-esteem on their reaction. When we aren’t looking for them to validate our tastes and choices, we can appreciate their kind words without being misled or distracted by them. Sometimes a lack o confidence makes us think we’re not lovable. You are lovable, I promise. But having me say it doesn’t help you feel it. We build confidence by making time for the thigs that matter to us. If there are aspects of ourselves that we don’t like, we should do something to change them. We have a choice: we can either change our mindset or change what we don’t like. We need to get in the habit of assessing ourselves and making efforts to improve our own lives. When most people set goals, they do so around external achievements. They want to be financially free or to buy a home. But the goals we’ll develop in the exercise below center on growth, not achievement. Knowing our goals helps us prepare for love. Then, when they come up in conversation with a potential partner, you can explain why they’re important to you. The other person might be supportive, dismissive, or neutral. If they don’t take notice, you can flag it for them, saying, “This is actually an important goal of mine, and here’s why.” You’ll want a partner who respects not only your goals, but why they are your goals.