4 Effects of Toxic Positivity

How to deal with toxic positivity?

Let’s try this.
Just 6 simple steps.

1.    Think about when you feel pressured to hide your negative emotions.

For example
→    With your friends
→    At home with your partner
→    At work with your colleagues
Take a moment to jot down these scenarios.

2.    Now ask yourself:
→    Why do I feel this pressure to always be positive?
→    What’s the one thing that triggers my need to be positive?

For example:
→    Your boss always tells you “It could be worse”
→    Your friends have always told you “Just think positive”
→    Your parents have always told you “You should be grateful”
That’s called “toxic positivity”.

3.    Alright! Now do this:
→    Notice if any negative thoughts or beliefs come up

For example, a negative thought could be:
→    “If I tell my friends about my problems, they’ll probably think I’m a burden and won’t feel like hanging out with me”

Naturally, that’s not true, right?
Great! So, let’s move on to the next step.

4.    Okay! It’s time to challenge that negative thought.

How?

By asking yourself:
→    Is it really true that my friends will think I’m a burden if I tell them my problems?
→    Have they ever said or done anything to make me believe that?
And the answer is… “no”, of course.

5.    Now, to reinforce that “no”, let’s find evidence that proves otherwise
What do I mean by that?

I mean we need to figure out why your thought might be wrong.
For example, after reflecting you might find out this:
→    “In the past, when I opened up about my feelings, my friends were there for me. They even shared their own struggles with me.”

6.    Okay, now we just need to reframe that thought.
How?
By taking the old thought and giving it a more realistic shape.
Tell me, do you remember your negative thought?
→    “If I tell my friends about my problems, they’ll probably think I’m a burden and won’t feel like hanging out with me”

Exactly! Now your new thought could become:
→    “Sharing my feelings with my friends can actually strengthen our relationship and show that I trust them.
→    Good friends want to support each other, and it’s okay for me to lean on them when I need to”

Do you like it?
Is it realistic?
“Yes!”
And does it convey practical positivity?
“Um, yes, of course!”

Great! We’ve done a great job