Overthinking Vs Mindfulness
When I have to make a decision, I:
→ Talk out loud to myself
→ And/or write down what I have to decide
So, let’s focus on this last one: writing.
Here’s an exercise that might help you:
→ Third-Personal Perspective
Let’s see how you can try it.
1. To start, find a quiet place where you won’t be disturbed.
Just for a few minutes.
Sit down comfortably and take a few deep breaths.
2. Now, focus on your specific worry.
Just to identify it.
In your case, it’s whether to change jobs or not.
3. Now, describe the situation by writing it down.
But here’s the interesting part:
→ You need to pretend you’re talking about someone else
So, instead of using “I,” use your own name (Melissa).
For example:
“Melissa is feeling really anxious about whether she should change her job.
She’s not sure if it’s the right move.”
4. Okay, you’ve just described the situation.
Now it’s time to talk about your feelings.
Continue to talk about how “Melissa” feels.
And make sure to be as honest and detailed as possible.
For example:
“Melissa is worried that changing jobs might bring new problems.
Things like a longer commute or less supportive colleagues.
She’s also anxious about leaving the security of her current role”.
5. Great! Now it’s time to give yourself advice.
Just like you would to a friend.
Imagine “Melissa” is your best friend.
What advice would you give her?
Continue to talk to “Melissa” using kind words.
For example:
“Melissa, it’s normal to feel uncertain about a big decision like this.
You’ve been considering it for a reason.
Try this:
→ Make a list of the pros and cons of each option
→ Then, think about what aligns best with your long-term goals.
It’s okay to take your time to make the decision.”
6. Okay! Finally, give Melissa some positive affirmations, like:
→ “Melissa, you’re capable of making a thoughtful decision”
→ “You have the strength to handle whatever comes next”
→ “Trust yourself and your judgment”
This is how we can:
→ Reduce overthinking when making a decision
→ Make a decision by looking at things more realistically
Of course, we can do this by:
→ Writing down the decision
→ Talking out loud to ourselves (my favorite!)