How to Build Self-Determination

How to be more determined?

Many times, the key is to go from
→    Extrinsic motivation
to
→    Intrinsic motivation

A tool that can help you is “Self-Determination Theory”.
It’s based on developing 3 pillars:
1.    Autonomy
2.    Competence
3.    Relatedness

Let’s see how you can use it.

1st Pillar: AUTONOMY

1.    To start, take a moment to list your top 5 personal values.

For example:
→    Health
→    Growth
→    Family
→    Creativity
→    Adventure

2.    Now, based on your values, set:
→    3 short-term goals (achievable within a month)
→    3 long-term goals (achievable within a year)

For example, 3 short-term goals could be:
→    Exercise for 30 minutes three times a week (Health)
→    Read two books (Growth)
→    Have a family dinner once a week (Family)

3 long-term goals could be:
→    Run a 10k race (Health)
→    Plan a family vacation (Family)
→    Take up a new artistic project (Creativity)

Now your question may be
→    Why does autonomy matter?

Because autonomy gives us the freedom to make our own decisions.
And that makes us more motivated and engaged in what we’re doing.

2nd Pillar: CONFIDENCE

Now, for each goal, follow these 3 steps:
1.    Identify one skill that you need to develop or improve.
2.    Develop a plan to practice this skill on a regular basis.
3.    Track your progress and reflect on your achievements.

For example, let’s take the goal “Run 10k race”.

Here are the 3 steps in practice:
1.    Skill: Improve cardio fitness
2.    Weekly plan: 30-minute cardio workout on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday
3.    Tracking progress: Use a fitness app to log your workouts

Simple right
Now the question is:
→    Why does competence matter?

Because competence leads to confidence.
And confidence encourages us to keep improving.
It’s a virtuous cycle!

3rd Pillar: RELATEDNESS

1.    Now, list people who can support each goal.
For example, for the goal “Run a 10k race,” you can list:
→    A workout buddy
→    A family member
→    A friend who loves running

2.    Now, schedule regular interactions with these people.
For example:
→    Monday: Run with your workout buddy
→    Wednesday: Run with a friend

3.    If you want, join communities related to your goals.
For example, you can join a local running group on Facebook.
Now the question is:
→    Why does relatedness matter?

Because having supportive relationships makes us feel connected.
And this helps us stay motivated and committed.
We’re human — we need a sense of belonging.